Is 'caring' our deepest human driver?
Buddhist practice to open the heart
As the Dalai Lama teaches, our deepest drive as humans is tsewa: caring. And what do we care about? We care about not suffering, and experiencing happiness (Source: Alan Wallace).
The Four Immeasurables can help you experience a lasting kind of happiness, which is not dependable on external conditions.
The Four Immeasurable Qualities that bring happiness for oneself and others are loving kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity.
How to deepen these qualities, for the benefit of ourselves and those around us?
Thich Nhat Hanh,
A world-renowned Vietnamse Monk says
“If our love contains loving kindness,
Compassion, joy, and equanimity,
It will be healing and transforming,
And it will have the element of sacredness in it.
True love has the power to heal
And transform any situation
And bring deep meaning to our lives.”
Let’s explore these four qualities,
And how to develop them by meditating,
To bring happiness for oneself and others.
The Four Immeasurables:
- Immeasurable loving kindness,
(Wishing others happiness)
- Immeasurable compassion,
(Wishing others free from suffering)
- Immeasurable joy
(Delighting in others’ well-being) &
- Immeasurable equanimity
(Regarding all as equals).
These qualities are said to have no measure,
Because they are extended to an
Immeasurable number of beings,
They evoke boundless good energy (karma)
And these divine mind-states are vast
And spacious like the sky,
Experienced unceasingly and naturally.
Let’s start with the Tibetan prayer
“The Four Immeasurables”:
"May all beings have happiness and the causes of happiness.
May they be free of suffering and the causes of suffering.
May they never be separate from the supreme happiness which is without suffering.
May they remain in boundless equanimity, free from attachment to some and aversion to others."
- F o u r I m m e a s u r a b l e s P r a y e r -
LOVING-KINDNESS
The first aspect of true love is Loving Kindness,
The wish that all sentient beings,
Without any exception, be happy.
Loving-kindness counters ill will.
It’s the intention and capacity
To offer joy and happiness.
To develop that capacity,
We have to practice looking
And listening deeply
So that we know what to do
And what not to do
To make others happy.
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”
Buddha
“What a beautiful message”
Marlys
COMPASSION
The second aspect of true love
Is Compassion,
The intention and capacity
To relieve and transform
Suffering
And lighten sorrows.
It counters cruelty and desire.
And contains deep concern.
It reminds us of our
Interconnectedness
Or inter-being:
Just as I suffer,
So do millions of others
In the same way.
With compassion in our heart,
Every thought, word, and deed
Can bring about a miracle.
JOY
The third immeasurable
Is Appreciative Joy.
It is the wholesome attitude
Of rejoicing in the happiness
And virtues of all sentient beings.
It counters jealousy
And makes us less self-centred.
A joy that is filled with peace
And contentment.
We rejoice when we see others
Happy,
And we rejoice
In our own well-being as well.
EQUANIMITY
The fourth element of true love is Equanimity,
Non-attachment, nondiscrimination,
Even- mindedness, or letting go.
If our love has attachment, discrimination,
Prejudice, or clinging in it,
It is not true love.
It is the attitude of
Regarding all beings as equals,
Irrespective of their present relationship to us.
The wholesome attitude of equanimity
Counters clinging and aversion.
The idea is that we should not cling
To relatives and friends
While regarding others with indifference
Or even hatred.
It is manifested as the quieting
Of resentment and approval.
Meditating on the Four Immeasurables
Practice training your mind gradually -
Begin by meditating on your breath
Allowing yourself to relax.
Take a moment to aspire that
You enhancing these qualities
Will be of benefit to
Everyone you’ll ever meet.
To practise the meditation
Of these qualities
One should begin with oneself.
Then developing the practice
To those you love like family and friends.
Then extending to strangers,
Followed by widening the practice
To those you find challenging,
Eventually including all beings.
Meditation on Loving Kindness:
“May I be happy
May those I love be happy
May those I don’t know be happy
May those I dislike be happy
May all beings be happy.”
Meditation on Compassion:
“May I be free from suffering
May those I love be free from suffering.”
Etc.
Meditation on Joy:
“May I be happy for the joy I have.
May my joy increase.
May I be grateful and content.“
Extending to strangers, enemies and all beings.
Meditation on Equanimity:
“May I be free from preference and prejudice.
May I abide in equanimity,
Free from attachment and hatred.”
And as with the three other qualities,
Extending to strangers, enemies
And eventually all beings.
At the end of your meditation session
Complete with aspiring
That by you doing this practice
All beings will be inspired
To develop these boundless qualities.
Bring your awareness back to your breath
Until you are ready to open your eyes.
The Four Immeasurables open the heart,
Heal our relationships to ourselves,
And deepen our relationships to others.
By practicing these immeasurable qualities,
We stop dividing the world into good and bad,
And we will experience more freedom
And ease in daily life.
With love, Karin
PS
Curious to learn more?
Feel free to ask me.
But even better,
Google your nearest Buddhist Center
And ask for instructions from
A Buddhist Meditation Teacher.
